By taking away what bothers you, you can reach your real nature. Here’s a list of 10 things you should stop doing to yourself right now:
1. Stop running away from your problems.
They will come back if you don’t handle them. Avoiding your problems is not a good way to deal with them. Spend some time on thinking about your life challenges and possible solutions. Write your problem down and start asking yourself: “How can I solve this matter?”. It won’t be an easy thing to do. But the bigger challenge, the more valuable knowledge. You won’t be able to solve all your problems at once but the fact that you will get used to them will make a great difference.
2. Stop pretending to be someone else.
What’s the point in creating false personalities if they are just illusions? Even if someone buys whatever you’re trying to sell, he will have an opinion on this artifical product, not you. Being yourself is one of the greatest challenges. That’s because media and society push as all to fit the bill. We all face great demands. And the only demand we should meet is to feel great in our own skins. It’s not a coincidence that people who get a lot of attention, respect and love are those who are really authentic and honest.
3. Stop lying to yourself.
You won’t make it anyway. Deep down you’ll always realize what the truth is. Lying to yourself will give you a transient relief and possibility to run away from your problems. But in a long-term it will cause mind pathologies and personalities conflict. Always be true to yourself. Even if it’s not comfortable. It helps you build a strong relation with yourself, and therefore boosts your self-esteem.
4. Stop focusing on things you don’t want.
If I were supossed to share the truth about the universe which I am 100% certain about, I would choose this one: you get what you give. Your thoughts and emotions are the kind of energy which you send to the world. It comes back to you in many different situations. So when you focus on negative thoughts and emotions, that’s exactly what you’ll get. Create positive energy and you’ll see the reality in new vibrant colors.
Don’t ask me whether it’s the law of attraction or something else, because the name is negligible.
My own life experience and quantum physics achievements are enough for me to believe in that.
5. Stop putting your needs aside.
If you can’t take care of yourself, how do you want to take care of others? YOU are the most important in your life so it’s about time for you to get used to that thought. Human being is evolutionary programmed to take care of himself. Unfortunately, it is being criticised by society and called “selfishness”. Thanks to that, people feel guilty when they want to focus on themselves. They start to look for acceptance in others, wanting someone else to take care of them. You should do that for yourself first - it is another essential factor in building high self-esteem. Then you can take care of others. Good relationship with yourself will give you power in dealing with other people problems.
6. Stop wasting your time on things that don’t matter.
Are things which you do in life and work important to you? If not, give them up. Your time on this planet is limited so start truly appreciate every minute. Don’t take the line that you have to work hard now in order to have more fun and relax in the future. It won’t happen because your life is here and now. If you can’t appreciate your life today, why would anything change? Your life happens right here, right now. Determine what is important to you and don’t waste your time on unimportant things.
7. Stop blaming others (and yourself) on your problems.
Passing the buck at others is very convinient but it’s also a trap. When you don’t take responsibility, you lose control. And when you don’t have control, you feel helpless. Then you expect others to solve your problems. If something is a problem for you, it is beacuse you perceive it that way. It is nobody’s fault, it is not your fault - just accept that and take responsibility for what is going on. Get back your control and think what YOU can do to change it.
8. Stop proving your value.
If you keep trying to prove others that you are a truly valuable person it means you’re not convinced about it. Don’t waste your energy on acting like you don’t mean it. Instead, direct the same energy to yourself, to your inside. It will help you focus on building strong inner relationship with yourself. Your self-confidence will grow. And that eliminates the need of showing others how funny, self-confident and outgoing you are.
9. Stop spending time with people you don’t want to.
Perhaps there are people in your life who block your growth or suppress your positive attitude. Stop maintaining these relationships just because you are used to them. Instead, try to spend time with people who let you be who you are and support you. Establishing new, healthy relationships don’t have to be time-consuming. It may turn out that these new relations will be the source of happiness and will inspire you to grow.
10. Stop talking to yourself unpleasantly.
Listen to your inner dialogue and pay attention to what you say to yourself everyday. Are these words positive, inspiring, motivating? Or rather unpleasant, critical and reproachful? It often turns out that WE are our biggest limitations. Change your dialogue by practicing effective exercises. Turn your inner critic into your best friend. In order to strengthen your relationship with yourself, you can start from scratch. Start from greeting yourself with wide smile on your face and proposition of happy, joyful day you will spend together!
Can you think of any other things we should stop doing to ourselves?